Been meaning to write about this for some time now. I have literally had to put sleep on hold so that I could do this right now as opposed to putting it off yet again. In case I make any typos, the excuse is already given. I’m writing this under the influence of sleep.
I am wondering how many persons out there have had to deal with being referred to as being antisocial, sometimes even resulting in to them losing out on being considered for a promotion or even a post deserving of their skills and abilities in relation to their job. This can only be comparable to situations where persons, usually women, complained about being passed over for jobs or promotions simply because those in charge of consideration of such promotions or allocation, often belong to gentlemen’s clubs such as golf, where females (unless they are of service or the entertainment variety) do not partake.
A recent observation brought this practice to mind. Most work places hold what they term – social gatherings, mostly on Fridays when salaries have been paid. This entails employees along with senior persons or employers congregating at some chosen venue – usually a drinking hole/pub. It is meant to be a social gathering encouraging work persons to socialise. I have absolutely no qualms about such and if I were to bring up my file from younger years, I’d probably rate as one of those pioneers to such gatherings. Mind you, in my younger working years, any social gathering was welcomed with open arms.
Thing is, some persons priorities to such gatherings with work colleagues can differ. There are persons to who their work or job defines all that they are about such that everything they breathe and live is interwoven with their job/work. This is admirable – especially if it gives the person practicing it, joy. It does not however translate that everyone feels the same. For most persons, they work at a job simply to pay the bills or keep the bailiffs at bay!
On a serious note however, it does cross boundaries of disrespect when persons who define their lives in accordance to their job or work; expect everyone else in their employ or working environment to mirror their passion or zeal. Writing off fellow colleagues or workers as being anti-social simply because they will not hang out with you at a social event and to later use this as reason for not hiring or promoting them to reflect their skills, I think is just plain petty and stupid. Their inability to join you in to these social situations may just be down to their personal priorities outside of work requirements.
Just as you don’t have time to take in to account their personal situation, you don’t have a right to dictating how they should spend the time when not contracted to be working with you or for you. Perhaps if these social events were clearly defined as being work related and paid for accordingly, then clarity from the onset should be done and observed.
Work colleagues or employees have differing domestic and cultural settings. These factor in how they priorities their time, when out of working hours. So keep in mind, just because a fellow colleague cannot join in with everyone every other Friday of the month down at the pub, it does not translate that they are antisocial. They simply have differing priorities for their time in relation to yours.