Not forgetting about you

“I learned… that inspiration does not come like a bolt, nor is it kinetic, energetic, striving, but it comes to us slowly and quietly and all the time, though we must regularly and every day give it a little chance to start flowing, prime it with a little solitude and idleness.”
— Brenda Ueland

Stress, fear, negativity, too much to do and doing things for others at the expense of our own needs — these all stifle our innate creativity. Relaxation, fun, meditation, and going after our dreams all get the creative juices flowing.

The above description fits most persons these days, especially those within the diaspora community I have crossed paths with that have yet to learn to take good care of themselves both physically and mentally.  That’s all they have truly.

On the whole most Africans in the diaspora in stressful situations strive to ensure that they save all they can, working sometimes 24/7 in all conditions, most, hostile simply because of the colour of their skin; just so they can amass set amounts to pay off debts back in their home countries, put kids to school, put in to business or build houses in the hope of having homes for when they return.  Dreams which turn out to be nothing more than pure hell on earth psychologically.

Without repeating the echoes of so many African diaspora before that have lamented on this, the very persons within their families they entrust such funds to are often the ones that betrayal them and will deny it if and when confronted to the point of even murder.  The relatives will blame each other or the government or just about anyone else, but themselves. It is pure and simple. You are forgotten to exist as a real person but are seen as a source of supply, much like the water from streams which not many bother to stop and question it’s source.  You just are. When you raise this issue you will most often be told candidly that you should have been wiser.

So I say to fellow persons: be kind to yourself, do not forget about you. Do not loose yourself in sacrificing all of you to appease or please everyone. This is an infinite task. Others will all be just fine with or without you when all is said and done. It is the way it always has been since time immemorial.

Question is: Can you be comfortable with yourself? Be creative – you will be pleasantly surprised.



4 comments on “Not forgetting about you

  1. BuriteSaidSo says:

    You’re now stereotyping families and friends. Some people back home are actually honest and trustworthy. Yet SOME people in the diaspora are also naive. Hey, when you leave, life doesn’t get static for the rest. Life happens to them too. They get work or businesses, they marry and start families et al, yet you who is over there does not wanna know. You think they got all the time in the world to do your shit but they don’t. Most likely, they also hire a foreman to oversee work on your house and the foreman plays them because actually, they are busy working hard at their job. When you’re returning for holiday, you ignore the fact that they have work to do and you insist on them escorting you wherever you go. Then you start nagging over how your town or even home is dirty……compared to your kyeyo area code or pad. Lets be fair, guys. And realistic too.

    • I think you miss the point. The point in this was to raise awareness in persons to ensure they protect themselves by not sacrificing their all. If your relatives are trustworthy and honest, then what I’ve written would not really factor.

  2. Julius. S says:

    so true..people hustling outside Ug r always disappointed by their some of their family members back home but it goes back to whom yo choose to trust because not all can divert funds for their own interests.

    • Hello Julius,

      It is not just Ugandan nationals that have raised this. I have sat in listening to various forums from Philippines to Jamaica, China to Nepal, North to South Africa etc. Everywhere where persons have left their native countries in search of economic betterment, similar echoes of being ripped off by relatives/friends back home have surfaced. I do agree with you that it boils down to who you entrust and that not everyone that stayed back in the native homeland is going to rip you off. It is just that when it is family members that turn on you, it can destroy your love for the homeland and all there is. I have a lady who has sworn never to return to Uganda following her sisters ripping her off badly even after years of sending back financial support and putting their kids through school to bringing them to the UK and getting them settled – she suffered a stroke as a result from the shock and experience. The nostalgia she held wore off and she has now has no fond memories left to get her to change her mind to retire back in Uganda.

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